i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
19 People Did The Wildest Things When They Were Black-Out Drunk
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
21 Signs That A Dude is Probably Insane
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money