And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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