He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
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