And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
