4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
You can't just leave with hair like that
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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