her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Randomize
