was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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