Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
