i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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