i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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