so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize
