It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
