Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Randomize