I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
