Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
