I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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