I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
