btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
