Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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