I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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