so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
