I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Randomize