david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize