Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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