a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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