I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
