At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize