I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
