That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
the day after is always just damage control
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize
