so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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