i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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