so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I just cut my nipple shaving
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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