he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Randomize
