I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
We were destined to go to rehab together
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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