is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
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