Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Randomize
