nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Randomize
