So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Girls should come with a carfax report
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Randomize
