oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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