I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Randomize
