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• (850): View more from Florida

  i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents

  (636): View more from Missouri

  never have sex?

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• 

  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.

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• (623): View more from Arizona

  Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  All my credit cards need to be pressure washed

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• (256): View more from Alabama

  She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.

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• (347): View more from New York

  maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life

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  19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.

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• (718): View more from New York

  Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.

  (646): View more from New York

  You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....

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• (763): View more from Minnesota

  I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.

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• (475): View more from Connecticut

  his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.

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