Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Bring me that man meat
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
