It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize