ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Randomize
