At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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