So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
