Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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