Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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