I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
