1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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