dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Randomize
